"doors closing. place foot here"

i love my rides on the smrt trains. their timings are predictable, you won't get stuck in traffic and best of all, it provides one with a good free dose of 'human behaviour at its uncensored best' entertainment. well, that's if you bother to observe what goes around you instead of shutting your eyes and pretending to be oblivious to those in need of seats around you. ahem. yes, squirm in your seats you guilty ones.

from damn public displays of affection (think guys' roving hands all over their gfs, "spineless" gals who cannot seem to stand upright without the support of their bfs, couples doing the 'let's see how long we can french kiss?' thingy), to damn bratty spoilt kids who think that the standing support bars and hoops are for monkey-bar-ing or for a fireman's practice, to people talking super loudly and airing their dirty laundry in public, to dirty old men (DOMs) who keep starring at gals' cleavages and thighs (to be fair, some gals really ask for it lah, don't even know how to sit properly in skirts. dunno deliberate or wat), the list is non-exhaustive man. as long as there are homo sapiens around, you will definitely discover/see something new in every ride. seriously. maybe smrt ought to make that their unique selling point instead.

so anyway, to cut to e chase, i'm gonna report on 2 recent sightings in the train. the first being: "doors closing. place foot here". the next time you hear this sickening 'dank i'm gonna be late cos i freaking miss the train' alert and know for sure that you can't squeeze your fat sorry ass in, do this instead: stick your foot in between the doors, wait and stare towards the train driver's direction. since they gotta be sure that all doors are properly shut before they can cruise along to the next station, you are almost guaranteed that the train doors would open again and presto, you can worm your way in! i saw a beng doing it the other day and i was like 'wah this beng damn smart lor, why didn't i ever think of that?' however, pls don't quote me on this hor (see disclaimer on my page). i do not want to be held responsible for any fatalities or injuries. i don't think it's exactly failproof though. for one, if you're wearing open-toed shoes, especially ladies in heels, it wouldn't be v advisable to pull of this stunt as the heel might jus get stuck in that platform gap smrt keeps warning us about. also, for the northeast line, i'm not too sure how much trust you would place in sensors instead of drivers' doing the check. so attempt at yr own risk.

moving on to the second sighting. the other day i saw 2 convent gals blatantly ignoring the 'no eating and drinking' rule on board the train and proceeded to have a nice mcdonalds feast of their own in full view of everybody! ok, i've seen pple eat onboard before but they normally try to be kinda discreet so pple will just close one eye. what's really bad was that they were in school uniforms leh. back in my generation, if got pple complain, sure liao one. further more, nowadays with the advent of mobile cameras, very easy to take picture of face leh, very hard to deny that you didn't do it also. hahah, speaking of which, that was exactly what i did. *evil laughter. i've been contemplating for awhile now whether i should post it to stomp, blow it up and get the 2 gals royally screwed. but scared later i'll kena fragged by the blogging community, the 2 gals' frens or smthg so i guess i should just stick to posting and rambling here instead.


and you know what's the best (or rather it should be worse) part of the whole thing? everybody was looking on with looks of disapproval on their faces but hey hey, nobody bothered to do anything about it. how typical.